6.12.08

Alrighty, stop you begging and pleading - it's not be fitting you at all (J.)! I'm not sure what to write about really...
w
Thoughts of late maybe? Which really entail a broad range of details and emotions. Passions maybe? Which entail of late music - playing and listening... Frustrations perhaps? No, that's just more mad rambling which I'm sure would only find me institutionalized for sure! haha. Daily doings? -snore, wha huh oh ya - ya no!
w
I'm wrestling through a season of seperation at the moment and actually enjoying it somewhat. I have always known I'm not really the best for communicating well over long distance - geesh, even short distances. It's so easy to get fumbled up in day to day routines - Wake, eat, work, eat, sleep - repeat. haha. I am still true to my words: "Do what you love and love what you do!" as you will spend more time doing that then anything else in life. In fact I see that the majority of our lives are spent working. Which beckons me to do just that love what you do and do what you love.
w
Days of recent have found me seeing that working really must allow for more then that with my time. I'm finding myself realizing that I've let go and allowed ample seperations occur with family and friends - the only true lifelines - work - well there will always be work to meet the ends needed. Of all people I should know to a fault how important relationships are. Yet, though I claim and esteem them with such high regard - I fall so very short of nurturing them. Silly girl - what are you doing and what will you do?
w
So of late, I've found myself - even amongst all the tiredness, to push myself out of my hibernating state - to connect with those. Oh my how the list grows lengthy as I realize how many I've let slip through my days. So in part this post is not to post at all...rather to connect in one form with a begging, pleading friend who asks for words... haha.
My life grows fuller with each moment spent with those whom I let slide - yet wow - the work is tremendous - not the time together, but really the timetable adjusting and preparing to go out and treching through the snow...arg... I hate winter - small rant. Cold, blistering windy, icy, ewww... oh how I long for warm weather again!!
w
It's been fun, and sad at the same time - as I realize how much I miss those so dear to me and allowed the daily routines of life to seperate us. It delights my heart deeply though that I carry such good friends - that time and distance never changes anything. Even though, much has changed - the hearts that connected didn't.
w
Relationships are work - wowzers are they ever - but you chose your battles - you chose to fight for that which is worth fighting for - and relationships are - regardless of how awkward it feels at first to connect - it's so worth it in the end.
w
I feel very privelged and like such a shmuck for letting so many grow so distant. I'm starting slow, working hard, to rebuild - retouch - reconnect - to do life a little closer then I have with my family and friends! We can't do this life alone and work seriously as great as it can be - just isn't enough for this gal!
w
This is what I find myself passionate about of late... people!
(how's that J?) lya girl!

2 comments:

JodyJ said...

I had to blink...twice! Well I think balance will bring about the life you want. Life is busy, very busy, but your right in the end it's about relationship. Relationship with God and with eachother.

doxasky said...

It is always good to re-connect. It is so hard to stay connected. We always find some excuse, even if we don't want to. While blogs and facebook and such help us fill in the blanks, there's nothing like a conversation with or the presence of friends and family. It's crazy how something so important to us slips past us daily.