Beware: this is a rant...

I am far from a trend follower. I am not fashion incompetent, but nor am I a fashion guru. I love style, most often admiring those who really stand out or follow their own sense of creativity through fashion. I understand there are certain environments that lean toward a particular fashion of dress... (I can't say I'd wear jeans to a wedding, or sweats to a graduation.) There are unspoken rules on attire to certain functions and gatherings. Understand! Get it, got it.

However, I ask you this... What woman wants to wear heels? Tell me this... Answer me why must we wear these brutally awful things? And did a man create them?

Uncomfortable: Gawd these things are so uncomfortable! My toes hurt from being pushed by gravity to my toes, where they bunch up and rub with every step.

Purchasing: Not to mention that shopping for heels with a size 3 foot is the most annoying process in the world!! Try finding a pair that does have bows and a six inch wide square heel that looks like they're supporting children! Oh, but if you happen, just happen to find a pair of adults close to your size - finding the right combination of toe jams and insoles to make them fit, especially when you apparently have one foot just a tiny bit smaller then the other - is like going to the dentist (actually maybe worse). Okay, so now we have them on, somewhat fitting right - so we think - and we're off.

Walking in heels: oh my, please don't make me walk...can I just stand in one place and look pretty? Please? Every step is literally like walking on your toes... but if you happen to be a heavy heel walker like myself - well, heaven forbid - watch every step - cracks suck your feet and plant you immovable. Slippage - every four feet, the back of my smaller foot - the heel slides up and down, catching myself so as not to fall or lose the heel completely. Heaven forbid you might have to walk a bit faster or make a sudden move - just not feasable! Plus then there's walking on cement or concrete - why not just follow a trumpet player - announcing my presence or upcoming arrival!

Driving: okay, so my foot slips off the clutch every other push - I'm gonna destroy my transmission! So I move the seat closer thinking that will help - nope! Might as well just sit on the steering wheel! I'm short - and already close enough, but heaven forbid I was to ever get into an accident - I'm so close to the airbag I'd die instantly! Flippin' heels - so I take them off to drive - only having to put them on again to exit the car.

All day my feet beg me...

"PLEASE GIVE US OUR CHUCKS BACK!"

BUT: here's something else... why is it that being in heels makes you feel so sexy. Yep, as much as I absolutely hate the things, even with a pair of jeans on - I feel sexy. I feel like such a 'whoaman!' haha. Odd...and yet, as sad as it is for my baby feet - I will again forlough the chucks for heels at the next function (or interview). sigh... my feet defeated in it's battle for Chucks only. haha.